This Happened Tonight

“Change is the only constant in life”

Change is inevitable. Change is the rule, not the exception. Each living thing goes through changes. Humans are not exempt from the change process and each of us is somewhere in one of the stages of change each day. Acknowledging and accepting that fact will aid us as we grow, mature, and experience new heights of life. Despite the wrongdoings, mistakes, and errors we may make, we all have the potential to change. That is the most wonderful fact about life. If we have the desire and capacity to change, we can. Change can be a slow process, taking months or even years, of replacing poor habits, attitudes and thought patterns with intentional actions, improved behavior, and healthy thoughts. We are all typically in some stage of change each day. And leaning on that fact, we should operate with each other with empathy and consideration.


I recently had a heated exchange with someone on whether or not you should judge someone based on past decisions/actions or on the improved behaviors presented currently. I believe that we all can change, and despite our past behaviors, we can become better people. I argued that the way a person operates today matters more than things that they may have done in the past that you disliked or disagreed with. My friend stated that they will always treat people as their past behaviors deserve, basically allowing no consideration that people learn new ways of thinking/acting. Because my friend does not think the person can change (or has changed, despite facts proving otherwise), they will perceive or find a way to interpret anything the person does as negative or wrong.

That narrow view of others and their ability to create change within themselves is what creates disconnect, chaos and grudges among us. Choosing to see only the bad (even when the good is staring you in the face) creates no forward movement in our relationships, families or communities. Being honest with ourselves about our past flaws, poor decisions and mistakes will allow us to walk in love, learn to forgive and truly see the best in all of humankind. I know I have made mistakes, but I’m growing and changing daily. I simply extend that same compassion and understanding to others, knowing I’m not perfect. And neither are you…mama. 😊